Story of the little lost dog

When we first met Kobi, I looked into his eyes and saw nothing. A blank expression was all that met with my gaze, he would not make eye contact, and would not even try to focus on his environment. Absolutely no interest in humans whatsoever. His little body carried him around, but his vacant expression showed no life at all. I had a horrid sick feeling in my stomach when I envisaged what might have happened to him in his short life. We will never know what he experienced, we just know all to well the coping mechanisms he had cleverly adopted in order to survive what ever was going on around him.

We knew it would be a challenge to bring a sparkle into his eyes, we had space in our pack for another dog, and we wanted to give a lost dog a new life. A life that would include being part of an amazing pack, eating fabulous food, huge amounts of exercise, even his very own bunk bed!

If I am honest, it was that vacant expression that sold little Copper (as he was then known) to me. Something told me that if this dog was to become what he wanted to be, then his best chance was to share our life. I felt that there was something very special inside his little shell, one of those gut feeling as evidence all around me was to the contrarary.

He was completely petrified of humans. To the point of freezing and completely shutting down if a human got too close. When he froze one could have done anything to him and I don't think he would have ever reacted. Dogs he understood and was fine with, humans he did not trust and did not want to have anything to do with. He was extremely underweight and had been flea and worm ridden when first handed into the dog rescue. Apparently he was found on the streets, but it was generally felt by the rescue center the people that "found him" were actually his owners. His original foster owners had performed a wonderful job of cleaning him, feeding and trying to connect with him. He quickly gained weight while living with them, but would not interact with them, preferring to spend most of each day in a cage, even though the door was wide open.

When we brought him home he quickly settled into his cage, it was his little safe haven, which we respected and would not infringe upon "his space". When he did come out of his cage if either Ian or myself went within 10 feet of him he bolted into another room. We had to wait until he was in a corner before we could clip a lead onto his collar, just to take him a walk. If we looked at him he would cower and drop to the floor.

We considered that he might be very ill or possibly be handicapped in some way. He had not pain responses and his reactions (or rather lack of) to certain stimuli lead us to consider this train of thought. He seemed fascinated with his own paws as they moved, almost as if they were a live animal that he could chase. It looked like he did not realise they were his own. Baby puppies I can understand show this type of bahaviour, as they learn about themselves and their bodies, but at possibly ten months he appeared to old for this immature behaviour.

I run, while others dream, and I dream....

3:30am this morning I awoke, jumped out of bed, threw on my running clothes and try to sneak through the front door while sleeping huskies dreamed. I failed. Kez was instantly alerted to my intentions and blocked my route from kitchen to front door, and Kobi tapped my legs with his little paws (must remember to not teach the next puppy to "touch" - huskies kinda like to "touch" with emphasis!).

The reason for my early start today? If I am serious about attempting a 24 hour event, my body needs to know what it feels like to run at every hour of the day. Listening to experienced 24 hour runners, 4am tends to be the worst time, which unsurprisingly does not phase me as I daily fall out of my bed around 4:30 to run across the Wiltshire countryside.

I love early morning running for a number of reasons. There are very few people around at this time, people are sleeping and I am in "my world" alone. Where there are no interuptions to disturb me from my thoughts and dreams in "my world".

The animals of the countryside keep me company if I need: Brock the badger on his slumbering slog back to Betty; Fred fox trying to sneak up on the first batch of this year's baby rabbits, unfortunately born too early, with a low survival rate; Snowy the barn owl, struggling to raise a family in his declining prefered home; Riva the Roe deer, less weary this morning as I chose to leave the huskies behind. There are others, all that I see regularly and each has a story to tell...

As I run, the miles slip by as I think, analyse and dream. I dream that Kai is running alongside me, like he used to all those years ago. I feel safe when I think that I feel his presence, him protecting me now as he did in life.

I think of all the hurtful and negative comments that people make to me, how hurtful I find them and how I can manage my mind to just let them "bounce off". I know I am super sensitive, and I also know that there are people out there that are not capable of sharing positive words about everyone. I do not know their circumstances and do not care to know, but hope that one day they learn that sharing positive words and comments is so much more rewarding. It is empowering when you see another person's face light up, inspired by a word, by a recognition.

Today I made a resolution to myself about how I will cope with those comments. They will keep on coming, of that I am sure! My strategy will be experimental, if this one does not work, I will try another strategy. I will not give up because if I do I will give up on doing what I love, and what I am.

My run today takes me round Salisbury's "Three Peaks". Not quite of mountainous standard, more like mole hills, but definitely hills in this relatively flat area of Wiltshire. There is Figsbury Hill, Old Sarum Hill and Laverstoke Down Hill, plus a little peak just above the Woodford Valley. The ground is very muddy and sticky underfoot, tough going but brilliant training. Energy levels good and no ill effects from yesterday's speed session with little Kobi and Kez. Thinking of both dogs, there are some fabulous stories that I can share about both of these guys. Kobi - the Usain Bolt of the dog world, Kez - the Haile Gabraisalle (note to check spelling later...)

It has been so long since I last wrote, so many adventures and experiences in the last year. I have some catching up to do...

The surprise of my early morning run was the chainsaw massacre of trees (I think) by Network Rail. 5am on a Sunday morning, in a residential area and these guys have chainsaws verberating throughout the neighbourhood. I could still hear the resounding growling as I ran over Laverstoke down towards the Hampshire side of home.

Mission accomplished I return to bed with a litre of rego, happy that I had succeeded in another area of my training. 30 minutes later I had to get back out of bed, run a bath and have a very hot drink! My body temperature had plummeted and there was no way that I could sleep. I will learn this lesson well and do things slightly differently next time